Winter has come

Winter has come. The wind howls. I would like to be Warmth and smell like fresh bread. People could huddle around me and lay their hands on me. Cold people, neglected people, those who have fallen through successive stages and continue to fall, the victims of social gravity, those who wear their clothes inside-out because the fleecy interior is so much nicer to touch, those who shun company -- I could accept everyone. If only I really could.

Out of body and out of mind while buying Winter street tamales

At a stand under a giant umbrella

In my brain it's snowing. The flakes make even the illuminated pathways so slick that thoughts pinwheel desperately before falling flat with a thump. I cannot form an argument. People think I'm stupid and crazy. They try to charge me an extra dollar for tamales. A cold sweat breaks out.

All around me the pinwheeled thoughts scatter in a transcendent trembling wonder -- glitter ice everywhere. I'm glad to be alive. It's so beautiful. The vendor's cooler is full of tamales, pork and cheese and chicken, worth every extra dollar. Jalapeños melt everything.

Meanwhile, my state of consciousness cannot fund its programs. It's Illinois. It's Chicago. It's ineptly governed, but I live there, with a plastic bag full of corn husks and tamales. You can't get that so easily in any other state in any other city. I drool while I walk. Goo goo boo goo boo. Goo goo boo goo.

I eat on the street. The icicles are beautiful frozen goo. I'm happy. These tamales are delicious, maybe overpriced, but who can put a price on deliciousness. The corn batter is so soft and the pork so tender, or is that cheese? No, it's pork.

Once I've eaten, I'm okay again, and I'm not sure what happened earlier, but I'm greatly pleased with my choice of dinner. It feels like I've learned something. It does.

Problem/Solution/Com- plication

Problem: Understanding the social outcast.

Solution: Empathy.

Complication: Ridicule.
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Hey, A List!

I have a party coming up. Because I don't have cable TV or any games besides Yahtzee (though, to be fair, Yahtzee is very much like life), I'm going to list some possible activities for the party, and you can vote for your favorites. You can even attend the party if you want to. At this party, there will be extensive drink and food and music. It will be absurd.

This is interactive! Vote no more than nine times. Top two will be gently forced upon the partygoers.

1) Uncooked macaroni and glue artwork.
2) Minute of gibberish (everyone gets up to a minute).
3) Poetry: Write four lines, recopy 10 times, modifying if needed. Post everyone's on the bulletin board. Make additional poems out of these poems.
4) Contest: who are the best thrusters?
5) Make it talk. (Make what talk? It.)
6) Finger painting. Finger painting on walls, maybe.
7) Shuffleboard. We'll use yardsticks and a frozen hamburger and tongs to handle that frozen hamburger as it spreads e-coli across the floor.
8) Bouncy ball from high up. I live three stories up. This is a fifteen second activity.
9) Bombs away! This is similar to #8, but due to indeterminate objects, more likely to lead to arrest.
10) Matless Twister. (Right hand carpet. Left foot couch. Right foot ceiling)

OK...vote!