Location: Chicago, Illinois, United States

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Darwin's Pomade

My tuft of hair that won't stay down despite combing and sliming and cajoling is beneficial from the point of view that reproduction is right and proper and spiritual. My cowlick is a trait bred down generations, enhancing the capacity to attract an asexual mother figure who will coddle me 'tween her great mams, hugging me so hard that I get so hard. We commit incest!

With wine, we reproduce.

That is the easy part. The hard part is all the discipline and masculinization of our boy when my wife is constantly adjusting the tuft of hair. She spits on her hand, she pats me down, she is six-foot seven and has breasts whose tidal influence is the moon. Plenty of shellfish and plankton wash ashore, but also kelp.

We grow a homo, and that is okay.


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