Location: Chicago, Illinois, United States

Friday, May 14, 2010

Problem/Solution/Com- plication

Problem: I can't dance.

Solution: I let the music give me more joy, so much joy that I can't help but move my hips whenever I hear it, and everything else follows. It's harder than it sounds.

Complication: Peeing at concerts. Or, for that matter, in the shower (I like to listen to music in the shower. And now I can dance!). I need a shower with a ceiling-high door, not a curtain. And God help anybody else who uses the soap.

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Anonymous Asylum Dolly said...

"things not to share" hehe.
Having to pee at concerts is the WORST!
And pee soap would smell pretty bad...but who knows? It could have therapeutic/healing qualities,like preventing athletes foot. Didn't Madonna once say that peeing in the shower was good for that? And if madonna says it, it must be true. So pee soap might be the next big thing. you should start marketing it. Celebrities love that crap.You'd make a mint.

But back to dancing.I can shake my booty good when drunk or manic. although the "good" part is probably in my head, while to onlookers it just appears that my ass is having a fit.But i think you're on the right track with the hip swaying.If the hips and ass are moving, then it's only a matter of time before the rest of the body joins in. People will be mistaking you for beyonce in no time!

1:55 AM  
Blogger sybil law said...

I think you need to video yourself dancing and let us be the judge. :)

5:16 PM  
Blogger jorg wobblington lopez said...

have you just invented the pee dance?!

12:47 PM  
Blogger JMH said...

Bon - I don't know if I need to be mistaken for Beyonce. I'll stick to marketing pee soap.

sybil - unfortunately, there's no mixing of media on this blog. You'll have to wait until I start a vlog.

jorg - I don't know if I've invented it, but I'm certainly making it my own.

8:31 PM  
Anonymous Asylum Dolly said...

Oh c'mon. You secretly do.

11:05 PM  
Blogger JMH said...

No. Even with the prospect of Jay Z ass sex. No. Especially no.

11:20 PM  

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